05 January 2022

5 January 2022 - Ashlee Simpson - Boyfriend

Ten years ago from this very point - 3:36 PM, Eastern Standard Time, January 5, 2012 - I started a blog.  It was born of a shared appreciation of a particular former sister-in-law of Nick Lachey and star of Melrose Place 2.0, and a thought that she got way too much shit for the SNL debacle.  

I didn't know what the hell I was doing back then.  I made a few sus style choices that I've stuck with (I'm not changing the font, people). I didn't know that I should be researching these songs a lot more.  So, this is what I said:

"Let's open up this blog with one of the guiltiest pleasure songs ever performed.  It's hard to be bad-ass in argyle, but Ashlee Simpson tries, and pulls it off to some extent.   It's really hard to say "Ashlee Simpson" and "bad-ass" in the same sentence while keeping a straight face."

For our tenth anniversary, I am PURPOSEFULLY revisiting this song that started it all.  It deserves a full treatment.

This song was based on real life experience, and is being sung to a very specific person. When you hear Ashlee singing "I didn't steal your boyfriend", she's singing it to Lindsay Lohan.  And the boyfriend in question was Wilmer Valderama.  That's right.  THAT Lindsay Lohan.  Simpson did deny it for many years, but she has finally come clean.  

The song, which came after her "career-ending" turn on Saturday Night Live, would be a worldwide hit, reaching the top 20 in many countries.  

You know what?  Before we get into this video, I'd like to address the SNL thing, directly.  Ashlee had a  SECOND SNL performance.  That's right.  She came back after the debacle.  And performed THIS SONG.  This song, the second biggest hit she had, came AFTER her career was supposedly destroyed.  Video of that performance appears on nbc.com - but they keep their rights pretty tight, so I can't post it here. 

I also want to apologize to Ms. Simpson-Ross (Diana Ross is her mother-in-law now).  I no longer have trouble calling her a bad-ass, argyle or no argyle.  

Also, I wish a video existed that included the original lyric. Because, it's important to note, Lindsay Lohan bought a lot of shit to Ashlee's door. 

Stop hating on Ashlee, people.  She's the Simpson we all need. 

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